I got a new digital camera, camera phone, plenty of art supplies and a few psychedelic drugs for Christmas that've really spurred my creativity. I've been introduced to new people, places, music, chemicals. I'm sort of straddling the fence on my living situation right now, I stay in two places at once. Since my car broke down New Years morning after a horrible party in downtown Birmingham I've been at Trey's mostly. He let me use his truck to go to work today and he's helping me get a new car.
Oh, I dumped Trey a month ago. Stupid little me fell for the artistic long-haired hippie type, he fed me all these cheezy romantic lines just to get in my pants and then fucking ripped my heart out when he told me New Years day that he's back with his ex. He was all just a dream that ended in a very sad nightmare. I feel so stupid and used.
Now I'm back at Trey's, but not quite back with Trey. He's "talking" to someone else, actually and I have two choices: Date Trey again and move back in and continue to depend on him for everything, or stay at my parent's house and be truly on my own. I'll have to find a car, probably get a better paying job so I can save up for my own place. If Trey starts dating someone else I won't be able to hang around his house all the time. I'd be stuck at my parent's place with no car.
I really liked Byrd. I really trusted him. He's a very, very good liar...
I want to hurry up and move to the city where I can get any drug I want, (LSD!), and pursue my passion to trip into unlocking every unconscious door in my head. I want to really explore Wonderland, be a psychonaut. Of course if I always needed drugs to be creative, I would have no real talent then, would I? But chemicals do help creativity a helluva lot. New perspectives, an ethereal plane of existance that we get to glimpse every now and again with the help of entheogens.
...to be continued >>>>
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